Thursday, March 19, 2009

Purging of another sort

What a crappy day. I am at my wits' end with the kids lately . . . I think they hate me. They don't listen to me and I am finding that I have all this anger. Why do I have to tell them 26 times to do something? The biggest problem is getting them (especially the twins) to clean up after themselves. They trash the house, dragging all their toys and books and dress-up clothes all over the place, and when I tell them to clean it all up, they ignore me. I tell them again. They whine. I threaten, I bribe, I reward, I reason with them - nothing works. The Good Kid Buck system I implemented a couple weeks ago? The novelty of that wore off really quickly. I've even resorted to getting an extra large Rubbermaid bin and dumping all their un-picked-up toys into the bin and taking it all away from them to teach them a lesson. The first couple times I did it, they were hysterically upset, but after that? Not so much. In fact, I think they figured out that it's an excellent way to get Mommy to do the clean-up work. Ugh. So today was a day like that - with me telling them to clean up their gigantic messes, them ignoring me, and me getting more angry and upset and stressed out as the day wore on.

Where have I gone wrong? Because I'm sure that the responsibility for this particular issue lies squarely on my shoulders. I'm not doing this parenting thing right. Not that my kids would be perfect angels if I were doing it right, but holy cow, I'd like to think they'd show a little more respect.

Michael is back on chemo as of this morning. I know it's a good thing - all towards him getting well, but I swear when he came home with the fanny pack back on, I felt like crying. It was like, "Oh yeah . . . that." Because the last week while he's been off chemo, it's felt almost normal again, like cancer wasn't a part of our life. Now it's back to reality.

And I haven't slept - really slept - in . . . oh so long. I am up and down, up and down, all night, every night with Finn. He's already been up once screaming since I put him to bed tonight. And I don't feel that I can do any kind of sleep training with him because I suspect that there's actually a physical/medical issue at play here - namely, the fluid in his middle ears that I was told he has a couple weeks ago. Maybe I'm wrong, but until I find out for sure, I have to believe that coddling him at night is the best thing I can do for him right now. But it sure is hard. I'm sooooo tired. All the time.

Tomorow's another day.


Larry said...

I am right there with you on the kids ignoring me/showing zero respect and I have to scream like a lunatic to get them to notice me - just awful - is it Spring??? I took out the Hefty bag two nights ago and they got hysterical and did clean up but I know it will wear off soon enough...UGH!!! And today in the market - they fought with each other over my screaming to get them to stop fighting until I was ready to beat them publicly! So now we are sitting here trying to do homework and then dinner/bath/bed since I have taken away all tv/games/books and cuddles for the rest of the day - what a drag it is...

Anonymous said...

I read about Finn's frequent waking and it reminds me so much of my own child w/DS who turned out to have reflux. She never spit up (low tone meant she didn't have the force to bring it all the way up and out) but acid was definitely washing into her esophagus. Can cause the frequent colds, congestion and ear fluid, too. Easiest way to figure it out is to try a few weeks of infant zantac and see if you both can get some sleep....Good luck!
See reflux symptoms below:
Some common symptoms of uncomplicated reflux can include:

* constant or sudden crying or colic like symptoms
* irritability and pain
* poor sleep habits typically with frequent waking
* arching their necks and back during or after eating
* spitting-up or vomiting
* wet burp or frequent hiccups
* frequent ear infections or sinus congestion

Lisa said...

Hmmm, I will have to look into this. Thank you. I assume infant zantac requires a prescription??