Monday, February 2, 2009

The randomness of life

Good things happen to good people. Good things happen to bad people. Bad things happen to good people. Bad things happen to bad people. I am convinced that it's all completely random, although, of course, there are things people bring on themselves, good and bad. I'm not even sure I believe in Karma . . . what goes around does not necessarily come around. There's no cosmic justice. There are people who, over their lives, bear far more than their fair share, and there are those who seem to get through life pretty unscathed.

Still, if I believed in God, I'd be praying right now. But I don't believe in God, or prayer. And I don't believe that Christians are spared anything - not pain or suffering or sickness or loss or death.

Where am I going with this? I don't even know.

Someone close to us may or may not be sick. We don't know. Tests are being run. It could be nothing. Or it could be a very big (bad) deal. I wish I could let it all pour forth here, the place I go to sort through all the crap that goes on in my head and my heart. But in the interests of privacy, I can't. So this cryptic shit is all I have for now.

I may or may not be blogging in the immediate future (for those who might notice and wonder). I don't know. I'm so scattered and distracted right now.


Jodi said...

Lisa, Know that you're in my thoughts and prayers. I hope everything turns out alright. Let me know if there's anything I can do.

Laurie said...

Just wanted to let you know that I've read this and am thinking about you!

Hector and Jennifer Varanini Sanchez said...

Hang in there Lisa. We're all here for you!

T-rex said...

I'm so sorry this is happening and I'll be praying health and peace for your family and the individual who may be sick :(

Nicole O'Dell said...

I've posted to your other two posts...I just wanted to add that, like you, I don't believe that Christians are spared anything. I also don't believe at ALL that God listens more to people who pray the hardest or who live the best lives. I don't believe that for a second.

I do think, though, that prayer changes US--our thinking, and our coping skills. Sometimes. Sometimes it just helps to put our cares into bigger hands and let them fall off of our own shoulders.

I hope you can do that during this time. Whether you dump on us through blogging, or on the shoulders of a friend whom you can touch, or through prayer. Just try not to carry it all on yourself.

In the big picture, I don't "know" you, but I feel a certain special kind of kinship with you and I care deeply that you're going through this and I wish I could help...really.