A Little Prayer

Hey God,

It's me, Lisa. You may notice that I'm composing this on my iPad. That's because I can't use my computer, because the power is out. Been out most of the day. Ever since your little song and dance this morning - you know, the hellacious thunder storm that sounded like the house was about to crash down around us. Yeah, you got my attention, okay?

So listen. All that atheist stuff? I was kidding! I mean, you can take a joke, right?

Anyway, I was wondering if I could ask you a favor. Make the power come back on. Like, now. Or really soon. Because I'm having this big tea party tomorrow for my girls, you know. Of course you know ... you know, since you're a mind reader and all seeing, blah blah blah (kidding!). So I have all this food here that's going to go bad, plus I have 11,000 cute little finger sandwiches to make, and I really need my fridge back on.

Think of the PR value. You'd get all the credit, you know. People will be saying things like, "Praise the Lord! The power's back on!" And honestly, God? Your image could do with a little improvement, what with all the wars and famine and catastrophic earthquakes and whatnot. This could really be a win-win sitch for me AND you. Think about it.

Oh, and while you're at it? How about you do something about these three zits on my face. I'm 43, God, not 14. Cut me a little slack here, would you? I said I was kidding about all that atheist stuff, okay?

Thanks, big guy.