tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2557928558578780512.post1688629136374518636..comments2023-10-24T01:00:32.845-07:00Comments on ADVENTURES IN MOTHERHOOD: Difficulty and Guilt in ParentingLisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07604477175816651214noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2557928558578780512.post-46242520946596052622010-03-18T12:31:54.690-07:002010-03-18T12:31:54.690-07:00I think your Annabelle and my Falyse are related ;...I think your Annabelle and my Falyse are related ;0)<br />the good news - the school gives you glowing reports! this means that you have taught her how to behave when you are not the one in charge, and honestly, that is a HUGE accomplishment. I have worked with other people's children for YEARS and not all kids can behave when away from mom and dad.<br />the rest is finding something that works. it sounds like taking dance away made an impact, which means it is something that should be stored away for future use. Falyse's impact - take away after dinner snacks and bed time TV. she will do ANY THING to keep these, so I simply remind her that we have certain rules ... not finishing dinner will lose the snack. not following rules will lose the TV.<br />of course, following through with it and having to hear them cry or see them pout hurts us, because we never want to be the cause of our child's pain, but follow through we MUST. keeping consistent is difficult, but it's effective.<br />good luck!!diane renehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14278917038491110157noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2557928558578780512.post-8513720218902359492010-03-18T08:47:00.748-07:002010-03-18T08:47:00.748-07:00I also have an Annabelle. He's 8 and his name ...I also have an Annabelle. He's 8 and his name is Nathan. The experts have diagnosed him with ADHD and ODD. He was on meds and went to therapy for awhile.<br /><br /> I stopped all of that. I didn't want that label and stigma put on him, especially by himself. He used to refer to "my therapist" in casual conversation and compare ADHD medications with one of his classmates. The side effects of the meds also scared me. I also didn't see any great improvement in his schoolwork although he did get into trouble less (his MO is talking to whoever happens to be sitting next to him).<br /><br /> I just try to stand firm on my disciplining like you did in this situation. Also, kids with ADHD have disorganized thinking, so it's good to have some type of chart or something for them to check off each night with their chores, homework, and other duties on it.<br /><br />Another little trick the therapist taught me (Annabelle might still be a little young for this) is to have him fill out out a tantrum log. So everytime he flies off the handle and has a tantrum, firt I give hime two warnings first and if that doesn't work, when it's all over, he has to sit and write out what happened and how he could have avoided it etc.<br /><br />Let me tell you this has done wonders for him. He absolutely hates to sit and write those things out. It's amazing how easily he can get control of himself when facing a certain consequence.<br /><br />Well, sorry for rambling on, but just know I feel your pain. Sometimes, I find myself dreading the time he comes home for school, because as soon as he hits the door all hell breaks loose in the house. i feel guilty for feeling like this, but it's life and it's hard.<br /><br />Hang in there Mama!Stephaniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07632541487016020760noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2557928558578780512.post-12506008976179648102010-03-18T05:46:47.610-07:002010-03-18T05:46:47.610-07:00I think all parents have a tough-go at it at times...I think all parents have a tough-go at it at times... and those Pollyana-type moms just kill me... but I was curious if you have a normal routine at home? This is what helps my kids the most... when they are off their routine, then look out - they are tornadoes, but when we go through as normal, then they are a little more controlable (if thats really a word)....<br /><br />I think you are doing a great job though... :)Addie Talley, Photographerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01024206808003120158noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2557928558578780512.post-27576581395013447392010-03-18T02:47:43.360-07:002010-03-18T02:47:43.360-07:00you've described my Harry. He will be the deat...you've described my Harry. He will be the death of me, I swear. I kept putting him in a 'box' saying 'naughty' (well, ok not a real box, just one in my head lmao) I've recently started reading Parenting a Strong-Willed Child cause clearly I need some guidelines on this. I think the 5 week program they talk about in the book will turn him around (I haven't started it yet).Angiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03352252890226423418noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2557928558578780512.post-88581488784308711752010-03-17T23:10:08.001-07:002010-03-17T23:10:08.001-07:00I think you are my twin. I relate so much to your...I think you are my twin. I relate so much to your parenting posts. I react exactly like you did and am so inconsistent with my empty threats. My 9 year old daughter is going to be the death of me. But I don't think it really started until she was 6. So your daughter has an extra year on her. Good luck!heatherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01061626477737855499noreply@blogger.com